Yes, we can definitely forgive and have the power to do so. However, forgiveness is not just an act or an event. It’s a journey. It starts with facing the fact that a tragic event happened to you. It’s important that you first come to grips with what occurred and face the reality of it. This takes time. The next step is ownership and acceptance that forgiveness is necessary for you, not the other person.  Forgiveness will not happen overnight. Although it is an ongoing process, you will know when you have truly forgiven someone. How? Because the incident that occurred will forever be in your memories, but they will not be attached to your emotions.  At the end of this road, you will have a sense of peace while never forgetting the tragedies of what occurred.

Anger is a normal emotion. Like all other emotions, anger must be expressed. There are many ways to express anger. One is by simply talking to someone who you truly confide in. Rage is an abnormal emotion whereas when it is expressed, people get hurt physically or emotionally in the process. Rage forms from many years of harboring anger. For example, when you are angry at someone, you can confront the behavior in an assertive manner and in a way where the person will get the message. No one gets hurt. However, when you are enraged about previous incidents that someone did to you in the past and the incidents have never been addressed, this is what could cause feelings of rage which could lead to potentially acting out as a result the incidents never being addressed. Acting out can include yelling, screaming, and intimidating. Thes are aggressive behaviors where people get hurt.  

Parenting can be difficult. Parents must play the balancing act when working with their children.  Parents cannot give their children too much space. This will cause them to feel alone, neglected, and alienated. Many times, children think they know what to do and how to handle a crisis, but the reality is they really don’t. In moments of a crisis, they shut down and eventually act out. Therefore, interventions are necessary.  On the other side of the coin, parents cannot give their children too little space.  This will cause them not to experience the realities of their emotions.  With the parents’ help, the child must learn how to relate to the anger they are feeling and must learn how to express their anger appropriately. This will take time.  

Parents can easily detect when the child is harboring anger.  Not by what they are saying, but what they are not saying. Many times, their nonverbals can be as loud as what they are trying to say verbally.  Non-verbiage can include, sighing, isolation, slouching their feet. These are just a few.